Re-reading that classic, Celebration of Discipline, by Foster. Struck again by how hard it is to make simplicity a way of life. Made these notes to myself:
1-Buy things for their usefulness, rather than their status.
2-Reject anything that is producing an addiction in you. How do I see an addiction? Watch for
undisciplined compulsions.
3-Develop the habit of giving things away.
4-Refuse to be propagandized by the custodians of modern gadgetry.
5-Learn to enjoy things without owning them.
6-Develop a deeper appreciation for creation.
7-Beware of all "buy now, pay later" schemes.
8-Obey Jesus' instruction about plain, honest speech. See Matt. 5:37
9-Reject anything that breeds oppression of others. Do I demand products that exploit the
poor? Do I feel certain tasks are beneath me, and yet require others to do them?
10-Shun anything that keeps me from seeking first the Kingdom of God.
May God give me the courage, the wisdom, and the strength always to hold the Kingdom of God as the number one priority in my life. To do so, is to live in simplicity.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Reflections
The week between Christmas and New Year's is always "Reflection" week for me. I have always been a goal-oriented person. That means lists, plans, programs, schedules and the like. So it goes without saying that I am a great fan of New Year's Resolutions. I start out with a bang, and plunge ahead. But like many others, my completion list is abysmal. I think one of the things I liked the most about running marathons was the great feeling of satisfaction of setting up a training schedule, and following through. In my book, the "runner's high" is vastly overrated, but I did love getting a job done.
Not so for most of my other resolutions, though. Through the years, the same 5 or so goals have been posted--so that tells you I never completed them. That's what makes my goal for 2010 so special to me. Last year, my attempt was to simplify in my spiritual walk. It was to not be driven to complete a certain amount of studies, or even do a study. My goal was to take my time with the Lord and see what He wanted to teach me if I would slow down and listen. One of the things He told me to do was to cut way back on my fiction reading. I was to limit myself to one novel a month. That was going to be HARD. I already had at least a half dozen novels I wanted to read, and couldn't imagine only one every 4 weeks! January was hard, and I couldn't wait til the first day of February, to start my book. I read it in about a day, and planned my March book. But something began to happen in those times between novels. I was thinking about my real life and situations, not waiting to race to my world of make-believe stories. My mind slowed down, and felt less cluttered.
Fast forward to December, and I only read 5 novels this year. I treated myself to a legal thriller by Robert Whitlow, and it was fun to read, but not nearly like before. Sounds funny, but I have learned that the characters in the books aren't real people, and the Lord has put real people in my life that have worth and value. And they matter.
So, 2010 is the only year that I can look back on, and remember a resolution that has made a real difference in my life. I'm looking forward to this week, to see what the Lord has in store for me in 2011.
Not so for most of my other resolutions, though. Through the years, the same 5 or so goals have been posted--so that tells you I never completed them. That's what makes my goal for 2010 so special to me. Last year, my attempt was to simplify in my spiritual walk. It was to not be driven to complete a certain amount of studies, or even do a study. My goal was to take my time with the Lord and see what He wanted to teach me if I would slow down and listen. One of the things He told me to do was to cut way back on my fiction reading. I was to limit myself to one novel a month. That was going to be HARD. I already had at least a half dozen novels I wanted to read, and couldn't imagine only one every 4 weeks! January was hard, and I couldn't wait til the first day of February, to start my book. I read it in about a day, and planned my March book. But something began to happen in those times between novels. I was thinking about my real life and situations, not waiting to race to my world of make-believe stories. My mind slowed down, and felt less cluttered.
Fast forward to December, and I only read 5 novels this year. I treated myself to a legal thriller by Robert Whitlow, and it was fun to read, but not nearly like before. Sounds funny, but I have learned that the characters in the books aren't real people, and the Lord has put real people in my life that have worth and value. And they matter.
So, 2010 is the only year that I can look back on, and remember a resolution that has made a real difference in my life. I'm looking forward to this week, to see what the Lord has in store for me in 2011.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Slow Movin'
More than 2 months since I've put thoughts to paper. Virtual paper, I guess. Have I been way too busy, or am I a little less compulsive? Maybe both.
An unexpected by-product of my attempts to simplify has surprised me. I think I may be learning how to be a friend. I wouldn't admit it, but I am guilty of being a "surface" friend. I justify this by saying my personalty type doesn't really need many friends, so I don't bother much with it.
This revelation has evolved because I am trying to really BE in the moment I find myself. I have quit reading most fiction because I found for me it was a way to put off doing more important things. Now, since I'm not always finishing up a book, I'm learning to engage in different ways. One way is that I don't take along a book to read when Stan & I are going somewhere. I am actually trying a little harder at conversation. More than just, "I'm hungry, how about you" or "Want me to drive for a while?" I'm not saying we have deep thought-provoking conversations every time we hop in the pick-up, but at least I don't immediately stick my nose in a book.
Where before I used up bits of time in a novel, now I look for other options. This has taken the form of notes in the mail, phone conversations, and the like.
Last week, I went to camp with our WATW students, and I decided to try something different. Actually, the Lord prompted me to do it differently, because my first thought was to use pool time and free time for a good book--I did deserve a break, after all! But He took me to a verse in Galatians (5:9) "A little yeast spreads through the whole batch of dough,"---and offered me a challenge. I know it's out of context, but this verse prompted me to be a little "yeast" of encouragement and investing in others, rather than doing my own thing.
I used this challenge to speak more encouragement into staff and students, to play some card games, to help in the kitchen, even introduce the sport of kayaking to a few people! The result? I know 13 people a little more than I did before. Does that please the Lord? I think maybe more than if I had just read a book--even a good book!
Change is hard for me, especially in the area of "my" time, but I think I'm growing. Even though it's sometimes uncomfortable, I like the feeling. A pastor I admire once said that if we want to be actively engaged in Kingdom work, we need to get comfortable being uncomfortable. I'm workin' on it!
Lest you think I've given up books all together, today I found a used bookstore in Cleveland I'd not known about. Spent a great hour or so there, with plans to go back. And yes, I did enlarge my library by a few volumes.
An unexpected by-product of my attempts to simplify has surprised me. I think I may be learning how to be a friend. I wouldn't admit it, but I am guilty of being a "surface" friend. I justify this by saying my personalty type doesn't really need many friends, so I don't bother much with it.
This revelation has evolved because I am trying to really BE in the moment I find myself. I have quit reading most fiction because I found for me it was a way to put off doing more important things. Now, since I'm not always finishing up a book, I'm learning to engage in different ways. One way is that I don't take along a book to read when Stan & I are going somewhere. I am actually trying a little harder at conversation. More than just, "I'm hungry, how about you" or "Want me to drive for a while?" I'm not saying we have deep thought-provoking conversations every time we hop in the pick-up, but at least I don't immediately stick my nose in a book.
Where before I used up bits of time in a novel, now I look for other options. This has taken the form of notes in the mail, phone conversations, and the like.
Last week, I went to camp with our WATW students, and I decided to try something different. Actually, the Lord prompted me to do it differently, because my first thought was to use pool time and free time for a good book--I did deserve a break, after all! But He took me to a verse in Galatians (5:9) "A little yeast spreads through the whole batch of dough,"---and offered me a challenge. I know it's out of context, but this verse prompted me to be a little "yeast" of encouragement and investing in others, rather than doing my own thing.
I used this challenge to speak more encouragement into staff and students, to play some card games, to help in the kitchen, even introduce the sport of kayaking to a few people! The result? I know 13 people a little more than I did before. Does that please the Lord? I think maybe more than if I had just read a book--even a good book!
Change is hard for me, especially in the area of "my" time, but I think I'm growing. Even though it's sometimes uncomfortable, I like the feeling. A pastor I admire once said that if we want to be actively engaged in Kingdom work, we need to get comfortable being uncomfortable. I'm workin' on it!
Lest you think I've given up books all together, today I found a used bookstore in Cleveland I'd not known about. Spent a great hour or so there, with plans to go back. And yes, I did enlarge my library by a few volumes.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
A Long Obedience in the Same Direction
That is the title of a book Eugene Peterson wrote about 30 years ago. I've always liked the title. Stan bought me the book a few years ago, and I decided I actually liked the name better than the book! But the truth of my walk is still in that title.
Simplicity, vision and purpose are also about a long obedience in the same direction. I started 2010 determined to simplify my life. This would also help me clarify, I thought. And it is giving me focus in unintended ways.
I am learning to be alone with my thoughts, and realize that introspection can be a good use of my time. I tend to value my day by the number of things on my list getting done. Often, the list is longer than the day. But the things on my list need to be quantified. You know---do the laundry, walk my three miles, practice the piano, even prepare a lesson. But some things don't go well on a list---think about what I read in Romans this morning, what does Paul mean in II Timothy when he says to enjoy the first fruits of my labor. How does that apply to me?
I believe I am just putting one foot in front of the other every day in my walk with Jesus. I think that's how I fulfill my "determined purpose" to know Him better. I will keep on simplifying, and clearing the cobwebs from my thoughts. I am becoming more comfortable with "just" thinking sometimes, rather than having a book or two by my side.
It's a battle, though, to keep on the road to simplicity in our world filled with all kinds of diversions. But then I remember a verse in Ecclesiastes (7:29 TEV), "God made us plain and simple, but we have made ourselves very complicated." I am daily choosing to no longer be complicated, but rather an open book for the Lord to use as He wants.
Simplicity, vision and purpose are also about a long obedience in the same direction. I started 2010 determined to simplify my life. This would also help me clarify, I thought. And it is giving me focus in unintended ways.
I am learning to be alone with my thoughts, and realize that introspection can be a good use of my time. I tend to value my day by the number of things on my list getting done. Often, the list is longer than the day. But the things on my list need to be quantified. You know---do the laundry, walk my three miles, practice the piano, even prepare a lesson. But some things don't go well on a list---think about what I read in Romans this morning, what does Paul mean in II Timothy when he says to enjoy the first fruits of my labor. How does that apply to me?
I believe I am just putting one foot in front of the other every day in my walk with Jesus. I think that's how I fulfill my "determined purpose" to know Him better. I will keep on simplifying, and clearing the cobwebs from my thoughts. I am becoming more comfortable with "just" thinking sometimes, rather than having a book or two by my side.
It's a battle, though, to keep on the road to simplicity in our world filled with all kinds of diversions. But then I remember a verse in Ecclesiastes (7:29 TEV), "God made us plain and simple, but we have made ourselves very complicated." I am daily choosing to no longer be complicated, but rather an open book for the Lord to use as He wants.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Spending My Words....Spinning My Words
Read something the other day that got me thinking. "We spend our words on lavishly sharing our stories; now it's time to spend our lives."
I like words. I like the way a right word can make a point. And even though I know a picture is worth a 1,000 words, I like crafting a sentence to present the image I want. A favorite from My Utmost is December 15, "Approved to God". II Timothy 2:15 says "Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive His approval. Be a good worker, one who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth." Chambers has this to say:" If you cannot express yourself well on each of your beliefs, work and study until you can....Always make it a practice to stir your own mind thoroughly to think through what you have easily believed. Your position is not your until you make it yours through suffering and study."
But I so easily get caught up in words. They come at me from every angle. With TV, books, radio, internet, cell phones, FB and more, there is an abundance of words both in my head and in the air. I have been "Home Alone" with just the dogs for the past 10 days, and I have made an effort not to have things going just for the sake of noise. Sometimes the silence is uncomfortable, but is is beginning to become my friend. In the silence, God speaks to me. Maybe it's just that He doesn't have to compete. Pretty sad to think that God would have to compete with the 6 o'clock news!
In this silence, He has reminded me that it's not about how I spend my words, it's how I spend my life. He took me to Isaiah 55, where God says,"Why spend your money on food that doesn't give strength? Come to me with your ears wide open. Listen, and you will find life." For me, time IS my currency, and I don't want to waste it. I know the places where He wants me to spend my currency right now, and one of them is the County Justice Center. So it was fitting yesterday, after sharing God's Word with the women, that one of them came up to me and said, "I like your words, and the way you talk. Where can I learn more?"
I just smiled, because it wasn't my words she liked at all, it was the life-changing Word of God that caused her to ponder.
Friday, April 2, 2010
First Quarter Insights
The first three months of 2010 have whizzed by, and the bookkeeper in me tells me it's time for a Quarterly Review. I have gone 90 days without using a structured devotional or Bible study for my personal time with Jesus. I have limited my reading of fiction to 1 book a month, and I haven't even picked out April's book yet! I have fought with the "stuff" in my life, lost a few skirmishes, but continue on the march to simplicity. Things just seem to multiply and overwhelm, and it's not an easy battle.
One of my favorite verses says to...make it my aim to lead a quiet life and to mind my own business....so that people who are not Christians will respect the way I live. That's another big assignment.
Something is slowly emerging, though, and I am excited about this change. It's like my head is not as full of fragments of different things as it used to be. Where before I was always reading something, I don't feel insecure if I'm not attached to reading material. I am memorizing verses (not on a schedule, tho), and I find myself reflecting more on them. I am thinking about things. Pondering. Reflecting. Looking for another's point of view. Asking God for His perspective a whole lot more---not looking for my answer in a stack of books.
In a nutshell, to know God is to know His Word, and as I take in more of the Bible, I deepen that relationship. I am sensing this in my mind, where I am becoming less distracted. It's like when a situations arises, I am able to see the root issues more quickly, and hear His voice!
Like many people, although I'm a great starter, sometimes the finishing of a thing is another matter. But this time of just the Bible and a journal is taking me places that are giving me contentment deep in my soul, even when things don't look so contented! I am determined to keep at it.....no matter the cost.
One of my favorite verses says to...make it my aim to lead a quiet life and to mind my own business....so that people who are not Christians will respect the way I live. That's another big assignment.
Something is slowly emerging, though, and I am excited about this change. It's like my head is not as full of fragments of different things as it used to be. Where before I was always reading something, I don't feel insecure if I'm not attached to reading material. I am memorizing verses (not on a schedule, tho), and I find myself reflecting more on them. I am thinking about things. Pondering. Reflecting. Looking for another's point of view. Asking God for His perspective a whole lot more---not looking for my answer in a stack of books.
In a nutshell, to know God is to know His Word, and as I take in more of the Bible, I deepen that relationship. I am sensing this in my mind, where I am becoming less distracted. It's like when a situations arises, I am able to see the root issues more quickly, and hear His voice!
Like many people, although I'm a great starter, sometimes the finishing of a thing is another matter. But this time of just the Bible and a journal is taking me places that are giving me contentment deep in my soul, even when things don't look so contented! I am determined to keep at it.....no matter the cost.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Knowing......Knowing About
It has been a busy few weeks, but somewhere in there I had the most awesome revelation. More than anything, I want to know God more and see Him intimately involved in every area of my life. He is my constant companion, but I want to be aware of His presence in an ever-deepening circle.
First of all, I must confess that even though I'm not formally involved in any studies, one of the perks of being a part of a ministry is that I am always intrinsically involved in a study of some sort. Right now, I am working through Experiencing God with our students, and that has given me some insight. And I just finished doing a Committed to Freedom Teacher Certification that also shows me different ways to be looking for God. (Diane Langberg says you won't find Jesus with the "pretty people," you'll find Him with the hurting ones.) And whenever someone preaches, I am the one who is always taking notes, looking for more depth.
A lot of this is knowing more about God, but for me it's hard to make that distinction and transition. I will sometimes spend hours and hours learning about God, but avoid sitting still long enough to meet Him face-to-face. But, I am learning a secret. To be filled with the Word is to be filled with the Spirit. God IS the Word, so as I come to know His Word, I am knowing Him.
Besides not doing any studies this year, I have limited my fiction reading to one book a month. I have always loved to escape with Ted Dekker, Bill Myers, and the like. I don't watch much TV, but I can use up a lot of time relaxing with a good book. WHICH IS NOT WRONG! But for this year, I have decided to relax (escape) in different ways. Practicing the piano, trying to paint, quilting, things like that. I am also renewing my efforts to memorize more Scripture. My psalm for this year is 25. I am only 9 verses through it, but it is being buried deep in my heart.
But back to this revelation thing. In the last week, there have been 2 or 3 times when I was doing something, and out of nowhere came a verse that was the answer to a question or situation. I'm not talking about the verses that I have memorized to help me through my "normal" temptations or questionable attitudes. This was something new and different. It wasn't that voice in my head that I recognize as the Holy Spirit that tells me to keep my mouth shut, or get that look off my face. Not at all. It was like God was talking to me through His Word in a way that I haven't known before. I can't describe it well, but I know I want more of it. I think this may be the treasure in the darkness He has promised. The Message puts Jeremiah 29:14 this way: "When you come looking for me, you'll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed. God's decree."
In some ways I have stumbled along in the past few months, but I think I'm on the right path for me, at this point in my life. Slowly, I am finding that I want to read the Bible more than anything else. Not always, but more often than not.
First of all, I must confess that even though I'm not formally involved in any studies, one of the perks of being a part of a ministry is that I am always intrinsically involved in a study of some sort. Right now, I am working through Experiencing God with our students, and that has given me some insight. And I just finished doing a Committed to Freedom Teacher Certification that also shows me different ways to be looking for God. (Diane Langberg says you won't find Jesus with the "pretty people," you'll find Him with the hurting ones.) And whenever someone preaches, I am the one who is always taking notes, looking for more depth.
A lot of this is knowing more about God, but for me it's hard to make that distinction and transition. I will sometimes spend hours and hours learning about God, but avoid sitting still long enough to meet Him face-to-face. But, I am learning a secret. To be filled with the Word is to be filled with the Spirit. God IS the Word, so as I come to know His Word, I am knowing Him.
Besides not doing any studies this year, I have limited my fiction reading to one book a month. I have always loved to escape with Ted Dekker, Bill Myers, and the like. I don't watch much TV, but I can use up a lot of time relaxing with a good book. WHICH IS NOT WRONG! But for this year, I have decided to relax (escape) in different ways. Practicing the piano, trying to paint, quilting, things like that. I am also renewing my efforts to memorize more Scripture. My psalm for this year is 25. I am only 9 verses through it, but it is being buried deep in my heart.
But back to this revelation thing. In the last week, there have been 2 or 3 times when I was doing something, and out of nowhere came a verse that was the answer to a question or situation. I'm not talking about the verses that I have memorized to help me through my "normal" temptations or questionable attitudes. This was something new and different. It wasn't that voice in my head that I recognize as the Holy Spirit that tells me to keep my mouth shut, or get that look off my face. Not at all. It was like God was talking to me through His Word in a way that I haven't known before. I can't describe it well, but I know I want more of it. I think this may be the treasure in the darkness He has promised. The Message puts Jeremiah 29:14 this way: "When you come looking for me, you'll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed. God's decree."
In some ways I have stumbled along in the past few months, but I think I'm on the right path for me, at this point in my life. Slowly, I am finding that I want to read the Bible more than anything else. Not always, but more often than not.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Treasures in the Darkness
And I will give you treasures hidden in the darkness--secret riches. I will do this so you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, the one who calls you by name. Is. 45:3
Ever feel like you are stumbling in the darkness? Maybe not really a darkness, but a fog? Sometimes, I do. In fact, I have felt that way a little bit lately. Oh, I know God is in control, and I know it all the way to the bottom of my feet, but sometimes it seems He doesn't want me to know "the plan". We've all got one, you know. It may be buried deep in our subconscious, but it's there. Part of my "plan" has some kind of reconnection with my family in it. No, we never had a big blowout. It's just the natural rift created by 16 years, 3 time zones, and the stuff of life. But I still feel an emptiness, and an ache.
A while back the Lord reminded me of His thoughts when He showed me Ps. 45:10-11, " Listen to me, O royal daughter; take to heart what I say. Forget your people, and your family far away. For your roal husband delights in your beauty; honor Him, for he is your lord." These verses give me peace as I navigate family waters, and I'm so thankful.
But it's still foggy. Foggy or not, though, I know the answers to my heart questions can only be found in one place. So through my tears, I stumble back to the only Place where I have never been disappointed.
Looks like my treasures for March will be found in Psalms. Yesterday I read a devo online that quoted Ps. 48:14. "For that is what God is like. He is our God forever and ever, and He will guide us until we die." So this morning, I headed to Psalm 48 for the context. Well, God gave me a treasure before I even got started! This psalm was written by the descendants of Korah. Wait---isn't Korah the guy who got swallowed up by the earth because he started an uprising against Moses? Went to Numbers 16, and sure enough, that's the guy.
And yet, it was his family who said....."How great is the Lord, how deserving of praise.....O God, we meditate on your unfailing love as we worship in your Temple....As your name deserves, O God, you will be praised to the ends of the earth....For that is what God is like. He is our God forever and ever, and he will guide us until we die."
So, I am looking forward to all the treasures the Lord is going to show me in my darkness, which really isn't so dark after all.......I love You, Lord.
Ever feel like you are stumbling in the darkness? Maybe not really a darkness, but a fog? Sometimes, I do. In fact, I have felt that way a little bit lately. Oh, I know God is in control, and I know it all the way to the bottom of my feet, but sometimes it seems He doesn't want me to know "the plan". We've all got one, you know. It may be buried deep in our subconscious, but it's there. Part of my "plan" has some kind of reconnection with my family in it. No, we never had a big blowout. It's just the natural rift created by 16 years, 3 time zones, and the stuff of life. But I still feel an emptiness, and an ache.
A while back the Lord reminded me of His thoughts when He showed me Ps. 45:10-11, " Listen to me, O royal daughter; take to heart what I say. Forget your people, and your family far away. For your roal husband delights in your beauty; honor Him, for he is your lord." These verses give me peace as I navigate family waters, and I'm so thankful.
But it's still foggy. Foggy or not, though, I know the answers to my heart questions can only be found in one place. So through my tears, I stumble back to the only Place where I have never been disappointed.
Looks like my treasures for March will be found in Psalms. Yesterday I read a devo online that quoted Ps. 48:14. "For that is what God is like. He is our God forever and ever, and He will guide us until we die." So this morning, I headed to Psalm 48 for the context. Well, God gave me a treasure before I even got started! This psalm was written by the descendants of Korah. Wait---isn't Korah the guy who got swallowed up by the earth because he started an uprising against Moses? Went to Numbers 16, and sure enough, that's the guy.
And yet, it was his family who said....."How great is the Lord, how deserving of praise.....O God, we meditate on your unfailing love as we worship in your Temple....As your name deserves, O God, you will be praised to the ends of the earth....For that is what God is like. He is our God forever and ever, and he will guide us until we die."
So, I am looking forward to all the treasures the Lord is going to show me in my darkness, which really isn't so dark after all.......I love You, Lord.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
The Seeking Heart
"God does not want you to become an expert at using a formula. If there was a formula to hearing from God, you would not seek Him with all your heart." That quote from Henry Blackaby, in the Experiencing God study, almost seems an inappropriate way to start this entry, because it is from a study. And yet, it cuts to the very heart of what I want to learn.
What I want are blinding flashes of insight every time I study the Word. Fresh new perspectives. I want to seek for the treasure. But not for too long. I want every day to be new and exciting, filled with new meaning.
Sometimes the most challenging part of my walk with Jesus is the dailiness of it. The very ordinariness of my tasks. This week, I found out a close family member has cancer. My computer crashed-again. Another divorce in the family. We re-listed the house in a very slow market. An aging parent breaks my heart, as her mind slips away, but her body remains strong. The normal stuff of life.
And yet, God is so good to me. He keeps pursuing me in this quest to know Him more and sit more often at His feet. As I am teaching a study on "Temptation" this week, I am overwhelmed with the privilege--and responsibility--of being a teacher. And from Proverbs, He encouraged me. Proverbs 13:17 says "An unreliable messenger stumbles into trouble, but a reliable messenger brings healing." In this verse, I heard Him say that if I don't prepare and study His Word, I will stumble into trouble. (Have I ever been caught just ad-libbing, or giving someone else's opinion?) But, if I am a reliable messenger of His Word, I can bring healing, and not confusion to our students. That's what I want to do--not just rely on what I think I know.
Then He exhorted me on how to spend my time with 15:14 "A wise person is hungry for knowledge, while the fool feeds on trash." Am I allowing my mind to feed on trash, or am I pursuing the knowledge and understanding only His Word can give?
I thank Him for all He is showing me along this trail. About relationships and how important they are. About hopes and dreams. Again the Lord showed me that 60 is not too old to dream. In fact, He even put a God-sized one in my heart! I love this ride with Jesus!
What I want are blinding flashes of insight every time I study the Word. Fresh new perspectives. I want to seek for the treasure. But not for too long. I want every day to be new and exciting, filled with new meaning.
Sometimes the most challenging part of my walk with Jesus is the dailiness of it. The very ordinariness of my tasks. This week, I found out a close family member has cancer. My computer crashed-again. Another divorce in the family. We re-listed the house in a very slow market. An aging parent breaks my heart, as her mind slips away, but her body remains strong. The normal stuff of life.
And yet, God is so good to me. He keeps pursuing me in this quest to know Him more and sit more often at His feet. As I am teaching a study on "Temptation" this week, I am overwhelmed with the privilege--and responsibility--of being a teacher. And from Proverbs, He encouraged me. Proverbs 13:17 says "An unreliable messenger stumbles into trouble, but a reliable messenger brings healing." In this verse, I heard Him say that if I don't prepare and study His Word, I will stumble into trouble. (Have I ever been caught just ad-libbing, or giving someone else's opinion?) But, if I am a reliable messenger of His Word, I can bring healing, and not confusion to our students. That's what I want to do--not just rely on what I think I know.
Then He exhorted me on how to spend my time with 15:14 "A wise person is hungry for knowledge, while the fool feeds on trash." Am I allowing my mind to feed on trash, or am I pursuing the knowledge and understanding only His Word can give?
I thank Him for all He is showing me along this trail. About relationships and how important they are. About hopes and dreams. Again the Lord showed me that 60 is not too old to dream. In fact, He even put a God-sized one in my heart! I love this ride with Jesus!
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Thirty+ Days
I've just finished my first month without any structure to my time with Jesus. I have resisted the urge to keep a checklist of Scripture I've read, just to make sure I have "done" something. I am even disconnecting my mental checklist, but old habits die hard!
I have found myself doing several things, and keeping them in a 3-ring folder, divided by tabs. This keeps me from looking for stuff that I have scattered over several rooms in the house (and car).
I have learned more about Paul, and seen "learning to be content" in a whole other frame of reference. I know a little more about what it means to be a friend of God. Mostly, tho, I have immersed myself more deeply in the Bible, knowing there is no way I can go wrong when I let Scripture saturate my life.
I once heard that Kathy Tricoli had a practice of basically writing Scripture back to God, personalizing and paraphrasing along the way. One day, she will have the whole Bible in her own writing, with her insights and prayers along the way. It looks like I am headed in that direction. As I read through some of my favorite books, I write out what speaks to me @ this point in my life, and that often prompts a prayer. I am re-learning the truth that I remember something so much better when I write them down.
I have decided to add another dimension to my time, tho, based on a message by T. D. Jakes called "Saul's Suicide". The basic premise is that Saul was not killed by his enemies, but by his own hand. My major enemies come from within, and they are as follows:
The challenge I have taken from this is to review on a consistent basis (weekly? bi-weekly? monthly?) which of these enemies in my life need to be dealt with. And it's not IF I've been disobedient.....or arrogant.....or rebellious....or whatever, it's WHERE these enemies have come out, and how to kill them. This should help me from getting too "spiritual" in my daily walk. Because, we're all a little delusional, aren't we?
Looking forward to Month #2! Thanks to my friends for their encouragement.
I have found myself doing several things, and keeping them in a 3-ring folder, divided by tabs. This keeps me from looking for stuff that I have scattered over several rooms in the house (and car).
I have learned more about Paul, and seen "learning to be content" in a whole other frame of reference. I know a little more about what it means to be a friend of God. Mostly, tho, I have immersed myself more deeply in the Bible, knowing there is no way I can go wrong when I let Scripture saturate my life.
I once heard that Kathy Tricoli had a practice of basically writing Scripture back to God, personalizing and paraphrasing along the way. One day, she will have the whole Bible in her own writing, with her insights and prayers along the way. It looks like I am headed in that direction. As I read through some of my favorite books, I write out what speaks to me @ this point in my life, and that often prompts a prayer. I am re-learning the truth that I remember something so much better when I write them down.
I have decided to add another dimension to my time, tho, based on a message by T. D. Jakes called "Saul's Suicide". The basic premise is that Saul was not killed by his enemies, but by his own hand. My major enemies come from within, and they are as follows:
1) Disobedience
2) Arrogance
3) Rebellion
4) Denial
5) Lack of Repentance
6) Ego
7) Murder--what we don't murder (deal with) in our own life, will kill us.
The challenge I have taken from this is to review on a consistent basis (weekly? bi-weekly? monthly?) which of these enemies in my life need to be dealt with. And it's not IF I've been disobedient.....or arrogant.....or rebellious....or whatever, it's WHERE these enemies have come out, and how to kill them. This should help me from getting too "spiritual" in my daily walk. Because, we're all a little delusional, aren't we?
Looking forward to Month #2! Thanks to my friends for their encouragement.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
The Accountability Factor
As I continue down this road of learning to interact more intimately with Jesus, I realize I have the need for accountability. I need someone that will help me to not just fall by the wayside, and go back to my old, more structured patterns.
Except for a running partner I had for 15 years, I have only had one time when others held me accountable. But it was that accountability that pushed me out of my comfort zone and enabled me to take a risk that changed my life.
When I moved to TN 7 years ago, I left a youth group at my church, and several young women that had become very dear to me. As only young people can be, they were excited for my new adventure, and wanted to be in on it. I had read about something called Women at the Well, and thought I would check it out when I got settled in. I told "my girls" about this, and they thought it would be awesome. So they would check up on me-frequently-to see what I had found out. It was actually their excitement that helped me up that long driveway to the Well, to ask if I could volunteer. Thanks to these girls, I was a regular volunteer less than three months after we moved.
My adult friends didn't offer this kind of support. They wanted to give me time to settle in--hang curtains and that sort of thing. Give me time to adjust to my new surroundings. Who knows, I might still be adjusting if it weren't for my friends, Hannah and Kristi!
I think accountability has gotten a bad rap. It's not like a hammer, beating people over the head with a Bible verse. It goes hand in hand with encouragement. It's showing compassion, but not compromise: empathy, not sympathy. To be an effective accountability partner, I need to be a great encourager. To do this, I have taken some lessons from Barnabas, the Son of Encouragement. (Check him out in the book of Acts.) Here are 5 qualities that help me become a better encourager/accountability partner.
1) People are more important than things. Barnabas sold a field and gave the money to the apostles to provide for the early church. If I put people first, harmony follows.
2) Believe in people. Barnabas believed in Paul long before anyone else did. Because Barnabas was with him, Paul was able to minister widely to believers.
3) Allow people to grow out of needing you. Don't try to make or keep people dependent on you. Although Paul needed Barnabas at first, as time progressed, Paul didn't need anyone to vouch for his character, and Barnabas accepted that.
4) Allow people to fail. Remember when Mark disappointed Paul by going home for a while? Paul and Barnabas had such a fight over that, they each went their own way. Paul went with Silas, and Barnabas left with Mark. But in several of Paul's later letters, he asks for Mark, since he was such a help and support to him. Something must have happened to Mark, and I can't help but think that Barnabas was a part of that.
5) Finally, we don't have to see the end result. Barnabas was able to see change in Mark, but I bet he would have come along side of him without that guarantee.
So, I am using this blog as a type of accountability partner. Something to help me not fall back into my old habits. And Kristi and Hannah, feel free to check up on me any time! I love you guys.
Except for a running partner I had for 15 years, I have only had one time when others held me accountable. But it was that accountability that pushed me out of my comfort zone and enabled me to take a risk that changed my life.
When I moved to TN 7 years ago, I left a youth group at my church, and several young women that had become very dear to me. As only young people can be, they were excited for my new adventure, and wanted to be in on it. I had read about something called Women at the Well, and thought I would check it out when I got settled in. I told "my girls" about this, and they thought it would be awesome. So they would check up on me-frequently-to see what I had found out. It was actually their excitement that helped me up that long driveway to the Well, to ask if I could volunteer. Thanks to these girls, I was a regular volunteer less than three months after we moved.
My adult friends didn't offer this kind of support. They wanted to give me time to settle in--hang curtains and that sort of thing. Give me time to adjust to my new surroundings. Who knows, I might still be adjusting if it weren't for my friends, Hannah and Kristi!
I think accountability has gotten a bad rap. It's not like a hammer, beating people over the head with a Bible verse. It goes hand in hand with encouragement. It's showing compassion, but not compromise: empathy, not sympathy. To be an effective accountability partner, I need to be a great encourager. To do this, I have taken some lessons from Barnabas, the Son of Encouragement. (Check him out in the book of Acts.) Here are 5 qualities that help me become a better encourager/accountability partner.
1) People are more important than things. Barnabas sold a field and gave the money to the apostles to provide for the early church. If I put people first, harmony follows.
2) Believe in people. Barnabas believed in Paul long before anyone else did. Because Barnabas was with him, Paul was able to minister widely to believers.
3) Allow people to grow out of needing you. Don't try to make or keep people dependent on you. Although Paul needed Barnabas at first, as time progressed, Paul didn't need anyone to vouch for his character, and Barnabas accepted that.
4) Allow people to fail. Remember when Mark disappointed Paul by going home for a while? Paul and Barnabas had such a fight over that, they each went their own way. Paul went with Silas, and Barnabas left with Mark. But in several of Paul's later letters, he asks for Mark, since he was such a help and support to him. Something must have happened to Mark, and I can't help but think that Barnabas was a part of that.
5) Finally, we don't have to see the end result. Barnabas was able to see change in Mark, but I bet he would have come along side of him without that guarantee.
So, I am using this blog as a type of accountability partner. Something to help me not fall back into my old habits. And Kristi and Hannah, feel free to check up on me any time! I love you guys.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
DISTURB US, LORD...
DISTURB US, LORD, when we are too well pleased with ourselves. When our dreams have come true because we have dreamed too little, when we have arrived safely because we sailed too close to the shore.
DISTURB US LORD, when with the abundance of things we possess, we have lost our thirst for the waters of life; having fallen in love with life, we have ceased to dream of eternity. And in our efforts to build a new earth, we have allowed our vision of the new Heaven to dim.
DISTURB US, LORD, to dare more boldly, to venture on wider seas, where the storms will show your mastery; when losing sight of the land, we shall find the stars.
WE ASK YOU to push back the horizons of our hopes; and to push into the future in strength, courage, hope and love.
Written by Sir Francis Drake in 1577, but so appropriate to my life!
DISTURB US LORD, when with the abundance of things we possess, we have lost our thirst for the waters of life; having fallen in love with life, we have ceased to dream of eternity. And in our efforts to build a new earth, we have allowed our vision of the new Heaven to dim.
DISTURB US, LORD, to dare more boldly, to venture on wider seas, where the storms will show your mastery; when losing sight of the land, we shall find the stars.
WE ASK YOU to push back the horizons of our hopes; and to push into the future in strength, courage, hope and love.
Written by Sir Francis Drake in 1577, but so appropriate to my life!
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Become Ruthless....
"Become ruthless in your pursuit of simplicity" is the lesson to be learned this week. I believe that my walk with Jesus integrates Him into every area of my life. Therefore, things learned and obstacles encountered in any area have the potential to teach me spiritual truths. That was the case last week.
Always running in the background of my life is the feeling that I have too much stuff, do too much stuff, and can be distracted by too many things. Periodically, I make attempts to pare down possessions, activities and distractions in general. I do okay for a while, but slowly "stuff" begins to win the battle again. Hopefully, this week becomes the benchmark, when I can look back and say I began to make real headway in my battle against "stuff".
It actually started 2 days after Christmas, when I ordered flowers over the internet for my cousin's 60th birthday in OR. (That was my first mistake, according to Stan, but I don't know any florists in Portland, so...) Well, three weeks later, after several failed attempts to deliver, numerous lies from the Customer Service Reps, hours (literally) on the phone, I finally have a confirmation of a credit back on my VISA. Sometime in the middle of this, while on one of my holds, I had a picture of people in Haiti being killed, maimed and left homeless, while I am raising my blood pressure over undelivered flowers. I was so convicted about what really matters.
Going on at the same time, I was having numerous computer glitches at work that were making it impossible to do my job. Nothing earthshaking, just frustrating. Friday was the final straw. My computer at home caught a virus. I got scammed on a repair. But what really hit me was that I spent probably 8-10 hours trying to get everything running right. Can't live without
e-mail and Facebook, you know.
I went to bed late that night, determined not to be consumed by my stuff and its maintenance. Something that I'm always tellling the girls at the Well goes like this--"If the worst thing that happens to me is that _________(fill in the blank), I've had a pretty good life" I filled in the blank with "computer crash" and decided I had made it way more important than it deserved.
During all this I just kept thinking about the people in Haiti, and feeling so petty about what I had allowed to steal my peace. If something is going to steal my peace of mind, I want it to be worth it. I want the things that trouble me to be the things that trouble God. Please, Lord, give me Your heart, and Your eyes---forever eyes.
Oh, and for my cousin's belated birthday present----money to Samaritan's Purse for Haiti Relief. She'll like that more than flowers anyway!
Always running in the background of my life is the feeling that I have too much stuff, do too much stuff, and can be distracted by too many things. Periodically, I make attempts to pare down possessions, activities and distractions in general. I do okay for a while, but slowly "stuff" begins to win the battle again. Hopefully, this week becomes the benchmark, when I can look back and say I began to make real headway in my battle against "stuff".
It actually started 2 days after Christmas, when I ordered flowers over the internet for my cousin's 60th birthday in OR. (That was my first mistake, according to Stan, but I don't know any florists in Portland, so...) Well, three weeks later, after several failed attempts to deliver, numerous lies from the Customer Service Reps, hours (literally) on the phone, I finally have a confirmation of a credit back on my VISA. Sometime in the middle of this, while on one of my holds, I had a picture of people in Haiti being killed, maimed and left homeless, while I am raising my blood pressure over undelivered flowers. I was so convicted about what really matters.
Going on at the same time, I was having numerous computer glitches at work that were making it impossible to do my job. Nothing earthshaking, just frustrating. Friday was the final straw. My computer at home caught a virus. I got scammed on a repair. But what really hit me was that I spent probably 8-10 hours trying to get everything running right. Can't live without
e-mail and Facebook, you know.
I went to bed late that night, determined not to be consumed by my stuff and its maintenance. Something that I'm always tellling the girls at the Well goes like this--"If the worst thing that happens to me is that _________(fill in the blank), I've had a pretty good life" I filled in the blank with "computer crash" and decided I had made it way more important than it deserved.
During all this I just kept thinking about the people in Haiti, and feeling so petty about what I had allowed to steal my peace. If something is going to steal my peace of mind, I want it to be worth it. I want the things that trouble me to be the things that trouble God. Please, Lord, give me Your heart, and Your eyes---forever eyes.
Oh, and for my cousin's belated birthday present----money to Samaritan's Purse for Haiti Relief. She'll like that more than flowers anyway!
Monday, January 11, 2010
The First 10 Days....
I have to say that being totally without form in my daily time with Jesus has been a little intimidating. Even tho it's not on paper, there is still this checklist in my head that begs to be marked off.
What I have noticed is that rather than thinking that I have ___minutes to get my devos done, I am learning to think this way. "I have __minutes today, Lord, and I want to get to know You better."
I really noticed this last Thursday. Larry Crabb says that Philippians is the "Mental Health Book" of the Bible, and I was desperately in need of some mental health. So I turned there to race through the four chapters again to refresh my mind.
But the Lord wouldn't let me get past the greeting! Paul called himself a slave of Jesus, not a prisoner of the Romans. A very different perspective. And if that doesn't shake me up enough, he starts out by praying for grace and peace for OTHERS! This got me to thinking about the awful conditions of his prison. From being at the local jail quite a bit, I know all about the overcrowding and bad conditions. But they are nothing like Paul had. Yet, Paul was praying for others, not his circumstances. Reminded me that God is always more concerned about my character and attitude than my circumstances.
It just kept snowballing, and I saw applications to my day before I even got to the parts I thought would help me! At the end of my time, even tho I only made it through a few verses, I had taken time to meditate on verses I had always rushed over. I felt like I knew Paul better, and through him, Christ's mindset.
A great time with just Jesus and me. Looking forward to more!
What I have noticed is that rather than thinking that I have ___minutes to get my devos done, I am learning to think this way. "I have __minutes today, Lord, and I want to get to know You better."
I really noticed this last Thursday. Larry Crabb says that Philippians is the "Mental Health Book" of the Bible, and I was desperately in need of some mental health. So I turned there to race through the four chapters again to refresh my mind.
But the Lord wouldn't let me get past the greeting! Paul called himself a slave of Jesus, not a prisoner of the Romans. A very different perspective. And if that doesn't shake me up enough, he starts out by praying for grace and peace for OTHERS! This got me to thinking about the awful conditions of his prison. From being at the local jail quite a bit, I know all about the overcrowding and bad conditions. But they are nothing like Paul had. Yet, Paul was praying for others, not his circumstances. Reminded me that God is always more concerned about my character and attitude than my circumstances.
It just kept snowballing, and I saw applications to my day before I even got to the parts I thought would help me! At the end of my time, even tho I only made it through a few verses, I had taken time to meditate on verses I had always rushed over. I felt like I knew Paul better, and through him, Christ's mindset.
A great time with just Jesus and me. Looking forward to more!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
A Beginning
Thirteen years ago, Jesus changed my life. When I gave Him control of everything, He began to re-vamp how I saw things and what I did with my time. Instead of just knowing about Him through church services and a haphazard reading of the Bible, I became consumed with Him. I read the Bible more consistently and was always doing some type of Bible study. Whether in a structured group or on my own, I had some type of learning going on. I would write verses to memorize on 3x5 cards, and they would be everywhere. Even though I was in my late 40's, I became involved with the youth group at my church, and together we grew in our walk with the Lord.
Since deciding to let Jesus run my life, He has taken me on a wild and action-packed ride. I have done some white-water rafting, and my walk with Him has at times reminded me of being in the middle of a Class IV rapids, with Jesus as my life jacket. Only as I cling tightly to Him can I be secure & know I will arrive safely @ my destination. On this ride, I have experienced many different things. Mission trips from South Dakota to New York City. Idaho to Mississippi. Even to Bolivia two times. Leaving family and friends and moving from Pennsylvania to Tennessee, not knowing what the Lord had in mind for us. The death of my dad, the birth of my grandchildren, and many things in between. In all these things, I kept growing in my relationship with Jesus, secure in the fact He is my life jacket.
When we moved to TN in 2003, I was able to retire from real estate, and look for new ways to invest my time. Within weeks, the Lord led me to Women at the Well, a Christian residential program for women with life-controlling problems. Although I had no experience in this field, He quickly showed me that we have a universal need for a walk with Jesus, and He would use me there if I would just be available for Him. I have worked there in many capacities, and being a part of that ministry is one of the joys of my life.
Through all of this, I continued to read and study and pray. I think it was 2000 when I first read through the Bible in a year. I continued to do this until 2004, when my pastor, Steve Best, gave a challenge to read the Bible in a month. "Impossible!" was my first thought. But Stan, my husband, had just given me The Message for Christmas, so I gave it a try. I gave up the news, some TV, and my mystery novels, and in about 30 days, I had made it through! The Message is so contemporary that its language added another dimension to my understanding. It sparked my interest in study, not just reading, and I began to take more classes. From Kay Arthur to Beth Moore, I underlined and read my way through many studies and loved it.
A couple of years ago, I found a "Read the Bible in 90 Days" program. The first year, I did it by myself. Last year, I challenged some friends to join me, and 2 or 3 did. So, at the end of 2009, I was gearing up to challenge some more of my friends. In fact, in my own subtle way, I gave out about a dozen copies of the "90 Day Reading Schedule".
But I began to feel that the Lord wanted me to do something different. I felt that He wanted me to put away all of my schedules, put the latest Bible Study on hold, and spend my time with Him completely. My Bible, a notebook, some study tools, and a willing heart. I gave myself my normal arguments that I needed structure to keep on track, and I wanted to make a good use of my time, but the Lord didn't seem to be convinced. So, I took a deep breath, and told the Lord I wanted to plunge in over my head, and learn about Him in a way that was not familiar.
So, on the first of January, I started a new path on my walk with Jesus. I know He is going to show me more of Himself than I have seen before, and also some things about me. I plan to blog what He is teaching me, and share this ride with others who are ready to try something different.
Since deciding to let Jesus run my life, He has taken me on a wild and action-packed ride. I have done some white-water rafting, and my walk with Him has at times reminded me of being in the middle of a Class IV rapids, with Jesus as my life jacket. Only as I cling tightly to Him can I be secure & know I will arrive safely @ my destination. On this ride, I have experienced many different things. Mission trips from South Dakota to New York City. Idaho to Mississippi. Even to Bolivia two times. Leaving family and friends and moving from Pennsylvania to Tennessee, not knowing what the Lord had in mind for us. The death of my dad, the birth of my grandchildren, and many things in between. In all these things, I kept growing in my relationship with Jesus, secure in the fact He is my life jacket.
When we moved to TN in 2003, I was able to retire from real estate, and look for new ways to invest my time. Within weeks, the Lord led me to Women at the Well, a Christian residential program for women with life-controlling problems. Although I had no experience in this field, He quickly showed me that we have a universal need for a walk with Jesus, and He would use me there if I would just be available for Him. I have worked there in many capacities, and being a part of that ministry is one of the joys of my life.
Through all of this, I continued to read and study and pray. I think it was 2000 when I first read through the Bible in a year. I continued to do this until 2004, when my pastor, Steve Best, gave a challenge to read the Bible in a month. "Impossible!" was my first thought. But Stan, my husband, had just given me The Message for Christmas, so I gave it a try. I gave up the news, some TV, and my mystery novels, and in about 30 days, I had made it through! The Message is so contemporary that its language added another dimension to my understanding. It sparked my interest in study, not just reading, and I began to take more classes. From Kay Arthur to Beth Moore, I underlined and read my way through many studies and loved it.
A couple of years ago, I found a "Read the Bible in 90 Days" program. The first year, I did it by myself. Last year, I challenged some friends to join me, and 2 or 3 did. So, at the end of 2009, I was gearing up to challenge some more of my friends. In fact, in my own subtle way, I gave out about a dozen copies of the "90 Day Reading Schedule".
But I began to feel that the Lord wanted me to do something different. I felt that He wanted me to put away all of my schedules, put the latest Bible Study on hold, and spend my time with Him completely. My Bible, a notebook, some study tools, and a willing heart. I gave myself my normal arguments that I needed structure to keep on track, and I wanted to make a good use of my time, but the Lord didn't seem to be convinced. So, I took a deep breath, and told the Lord I wanted to plunge in over my head, and learn about Him in a way that was not familiar.
So, on the first of January, I started a new path on my walk with Jesus. I know He is going to show me more of Himself than I have seen before, and also some things about me. I plan to blog what He is teaching me, and share this ride with others who are ready to try something different.
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